If the NFL is to prove their progressive cred, they must begin to bring social justice to their games and play by the same progressive rules that have been adopted in all other spheres of life.
First of all, they must “level the playing field” by building a slope. Let’s call it Affirmative Action in Sports.
Having a slope means that a weaker team playing downhill will have a fair advantage over a stronger team that plays uphill. If the stronger team is still winning, make them wear “the foot shackles of fairness.” The referees, just like Supreme Court nominees, must feel a moral obligation to rule in favor of the weaker team.
This means that eventually there will be no point in practicing, building strength, and learning strategies because all players will be given a fair chance to win. And if such rules will lead to the eventual death of football and the NFL, hasn’t it always been the real goal of the progressive movement?
The picture above shows a progressively leveled playing field for soccer, a more enlightened game favored by European comrades.
EDITORS NOTE: This political satire by Red Square originally appeared in The Peoples Cube.