Pelosi Defends Ripping Up Trump’s Speech, Saying It Was Just A ‘Clump Of Cells’

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Nancy Pelosi has been criticized for tearing up President Trump’s speech after the State of the Union since immature behavior is almost completely unheard of among politicians.

But Pelosi has stuck by her actions, saying that tearing things up comes naturally to Democrats, whether those things are speeches about America and patriotism or unborn babies.

“What difference does it make?” she asked in her response after Democrats figured out how to operate the video camera. “It’s just a clump of paper cells, no biggie. In no way is this representative of our hate for America.”

“We need to tear the speech up to see what’s in it.”

Planned Parenthood applauded the tearing up of the speech, pointing out that the ripping of the paper was very similar to the procedure used to tear an unborn baby from his or her mother limb from limb. “It’s great that in 2020, elected officials can finally demonstrate a late-term abortion procedure live on camera,” said a PP spokesperson. “We are no longer living in the barbaric dark ages.”

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EDITORS NOTE: This political satire column by The Babylon Bee is republished with permission. © All rights reserved.

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