Federal Judge Rules That Jewish Baker Must Make ‘Death To Israel’ Cake For Arab Customer

NEW YORK, N.Y.—A federal appeals court judge has ruled that a Jewish bakeshop owner must comply with his Arab customer’s request to bake a “Death To Israel” cake.

Jacob Greenstein, the owner of Jake Bakes Cakes in Brooklyn, said the controversy started after a customer ordered a special Hamas-themed “Death To Israel” cake for his son’s sixth birthday party.

“He wanted me to bake a cake with the words “DEATH TO ISRAEL” on the top in bold lettering,” Greenstein said. “He offered me extra money if I could put a few Jewish dead bodies on the sides. I thought it was offensive since I’m an Israeli Jew, so I politely declined.”

Greenstein said the customer was enraged at his refusal and took the matter to court. After Greenstein won at trial, the customer eventually appealed to a federal circuit court where a judge overturned the ruling.

“The American right to cake is just as sacred as the right to kill unborn babies, choose your own pronouns, and vote by mail without showing ID or proof of citizenship,” the judge said in his scathing 12-page ruling. “As such, I decree that Jake Bakes Cakes must bake the ‘Death To Israel’ cake.”

“Furthermore, the cake must be chocolaty and delicious, with buttercream frosting that’s sweet but not too overpowering,” the judge continued. “And everyone must wear masks while baking it, lest any COVID particles get into the batter. Thus sayeth the government.”

Greenstein said he plans to appeal the decision all the way to the supreme court if necessary, but that he’s having trouble finding a lawyer. “Most of the law firms I’ve talked to said they’re refusing to take my case because I’m Jewish,” he said.

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EDITORS NOTE: This political satire column by The Babylon Bee is republished with permission. ©All rights reserved.

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