Bernie Sanders famously said that “real” socialism has never been tried. Frankly, we’re shocked he would ever suggest such a thing because there are numerous examples of real socialist utopias that we have to pull from.
Here are just a few:
1) Star Trek’s Federation of Planets: There’s no money, but people still work for some reason. Workers of the world, set your phasers to Social Contract!
2) The Borg Collective: Like a more efficient Federation that tears through freedom-loving planets and subjects them to the will of the collective.
3) In the wonderful dream AOC had last night: Elon Musk even made an appearance.
4) In John Lennon’s “Imagine”: Everything works perfectly when you imagine it! Even marriage to Yoko Ono.
5) Smurf Village: Cheerful workers in a heavily regulated population. Just like China.
6) In Bernie Sander’s serial fanfic: He’s been writing Social Thunder for three years now. It’s a big hit on his Substack.
7) A beaver dam: Everyone chips in or they all die.
8) The nuclear family: Too bad the nuclear family is RACIST.
9) An ant farm: It worked great until a kid came and shook it up.
10) Whatever South American country Che Guevara ruled: We’re sure socialism worked there, otherwise people wouldn’t still be wearing the shirt
You see! Socialism is alive and well today. You only have to open yourself up to the imaginary world behind you and seize the means of production for the proletariat!
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EDITORS NOTE: This political satire by The Babylon Bee is republished with permission. ©All rights reserved.