All The Worst Kinds of People

ALL THE WORST KINDS OF PEOPLE

We all know that Trump has frozen the assets of the most prestigious (lol) Ivy League universities over their commitment to explicitly racist admissions and administrative policies.

To drill down into that a bit: There’s a tiered system in these universities that’s based solely on race and identity. They don’t even try to hide it. And it persists from admissions to graduation.

Recently, schools like Harvard bathed in the applause of the ruling class Acela Elites when they “stood up” to Trump’s demands.

Not to digress, but just in brief, those demands include:

• Disempowering student body organizations, faculty and administrators “more dedicated to activism than scholarship”
• Merit-based hiring reform that “ceases all preference” for race, color, creed, sex or national origin
• Merit-based admissions reform that does likewise
• Conduct an on “viewpoint diversity” in each department
• Reform departments that are most disruptive to student life and scholarship
• Discontinue DEI
• Also, please stop giving foreigners access to national secrets, you dolts

There are a few others, but for the most part they just scream common sense. Don’t be institutionally racist! Advance your studies! Find the best people for the job! Discipline troublemakers! And finally, in case you didn’t hear it the first time, don’t be racist!

The sheer umbrage of these demands prompted Harvard to stand up and say no. We are committed to hyper-racial neo-marxist ideology, chronic underperformance, stultifying groupthink, and extrajudicial punishments for anyone who dares buck our system of oppression.

Good for Harvard! Except … the bill is steep — $2.2 billion for Harvard and $1 billion for Yale.

But they do have those giant endowments they’ve been sitting on, right?

And thus comes the most delicious part.

Yale’s attempting to liquidate $6 billion in private equity holdings and Harvard another $1 billion. To normal people, like you and me, Dear Reader, these numbers might as well be imaginary.

I assure you, however, it’ll have an effect on the market.

Universities don’t tend to disclose which firms they do their business with, but some of the most prominent private equity firms in the business are likely to be affected.

What happens when a PE firm loses a significant percentage of its portfolio? All its holdings go down. People start to get skeptical about their decisions. Maybe more people transfer their investments to more … stable … actors.

It can cause a cascading effect.

Or … they’re going to call Trump.

Can we pause right here just to revel in the deliciousness of these people taking a shot in the groin over refusing to meet the most basic demands?

Ivy League elites and their snotty students. High-powered, private equity douches who think they’re “smart money” when in reality they’re just a flock of terrified birds. Both groups have in some parts sold themselves and Americans out to foreign buyers.

In other words, all the worst kinds of people.

It reminds me in some ways of the Gamestop squeeze a few years ago that saw retail investors nuke the bets of several prominent, multibillion-dollar funds.

This is the follow up. The Trump squeeze. Donny is back on campus. He’s got a new shillelagh. It’s got 77 million names etched into it, and I guarantee you very few of those names got into either Harvard or Yale.

Back to the call.

If these sales start to look more serious, and it’s likely, Trump could be receiving calls from these PE firms. And that, ladies and gents, is Trump’s side door.

He kicked in academia’s front door, but now he’ll be coming in through the windows.

These calls give Trump the opportunity to double down. A la, ‘Hey, guys, listen, these aren’t insane demands. Go back to your clients (Harvard, Yale) and tell them it’s in everyone’s interest to lighten up a bit.’

Weaponizing the greed of terrible financiers against the lunacy of uppity academic elitists.

That’s one little battle I look forward to seeing!

AUTHOR

Geoffrey Ingersoll

Editor at Large.

WHAT I’M READING:

Well first of all, I’m reading Amber Duke’s newsletter twice weekly.

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