American workers and peasants! A danger is creeping over the beloved socialist government in Venezuela. A Yankee imperialist coup is about to overthrow their heroic leader, who has a unanimous support of all progressive celebrities and Democratic Socialists in the U.S. It compels us to produce these Party-approved slogans and visual agitation, to be printed in thousands of copies, displayed and chanted enthusiastically at Party-organized spontaneous rallies in your neighborhoods, schools, factories, and collective farms.
Comrades! Struggle to keep the countries of winning democratic socialism pure! Do not allow capitalism to destroy their hard-earned, hard-fought economic equality!
Who are we to impose our Western imperialist values on these suffering minorities? Their glorious Marxist leaders have all been democratically and unanimously elected by 150% of the people, with a 100% turnout. Remind yourselves that they are on the right side of history, and the Glorious Progressive World of Next Tuesday is just around the corner. It’s simply taking a little longer than we had anticipated a hundred years ago.
KORREKTION: It appears that our agitprop artist has made a typo, misspelling “pure” as “poor.” A swift investigation by a tribunal has determined that the error occurred while the artist, who is not a native English speaker, was taking our directions over an audio receiver. Rest assured that the guilty have been punished and the artist will never paint again on account of having his fingers broken during the necessary interrogation.
EDITORS NOTE: This political satire column with images by Red Square originally appeared on The Peoples Cube. It is republished with permission.