10 Surefire Ways To Get Out Of Wearing A Mask When Someone Tells You To

Everywhere you look, there are petty tyrants trying to steal your freedom by making you wear a mask! We say ENOUGH! If you’re as sick of it as we are, here are 10 handy methods to help you avoid wearing a mask when someone tells you to!

1) Smack them with your pocket Constitution – A Bill of Rights to the face oughtta stop them.

2) Shout “Am I being detained?!” while waving your Gadsden flag – NO STEP ON SNEK!

3) Slowly eat a giant tub of cheese puffs – As long as you’re eating, you don’t have to wear a mask.

4) Dress up as an illegal immigrant – They get to move about freely. Thanks, Biden!

5) Wear a “Tax the Rich” dress and pretend you’re at the Met Gala. – AOC showed us how well this one works.

6) Smugly tell them you identify as wearing a mask. – LOLOLOLOL OWNED. Classic joke.

7) Summon the musket-wielding minutemen. – Rise up, brothers! Tally ho!

8) Wave a Scottish claymore around above your head while screaming “FREEEEEEDOM!” – Works every time.

9) Put on your “Trump Won” mask – They’ll instantly regret their decision to make you wear one. 4D chess!

10) Just put on the mask like the brainwashed beta cuck sheeple you are. – Time to embrace your identity as a total loser. Baaaa!!!

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EDITORS NOTE: This political satire column by The Babylon Bee is republished with permission. ©All rights reserved.

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