Entries by The Peoples Cube

Mueller Bombshell: Trump Turned Me Into A Newt

According to a story by our reliable subsidiary, the Babylon Bee, former FBI director Robert Mueller ordered that Trump be weighed against a duck to determine whether the sitting president is a witch. Because of the clearly established pattern of Russian collusion, Mueller stated that Trump may actually be an incarnation of Baba Yaga. “I wouldn’t […]

Elizebeth Warren takes her dog Wahanassatta campaigning

Democratic Massachusetts Sen. Elizabeth Warren, who is a self-identified hominoid, has a new anthropomorphized advocate on the campaign trail – and Donald Trump Jr. says it’s proof that she is struggling to resonate with her homo sapiens base as a bipedal homo erectus. Warren, who declared her intention to seek the 2020 Democratic nomination last month, has […]

I believe Jussie Smollett and here’s why

I love Jussie. I believe Jussie! The police are lying about him. You know how much police hate black people.  By arresting Jussie, the police are only emboldening Trump supporters, making it easier for them to target innocent, defenseless, helpless-without-the-government progs like me.  Why, just last night I was in San Francisco, or maybe it […]

How to play Pull-a-Smollett: The Game of Social Engineering

At the risk of losing the punch line in the translation, let me start with a Russian joke: “We’re sorry, but you’re no longer welcome in our house.”“Why is that?”“The last time you visited, one of our spoons went missing.”“What nonsense, why would I steal your silverware?”“We’re not saying you did, we found it a […]

MABA! A new movement

A new movement has been launched to make Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez a barmaid again.  Due to her being sent to Washington, she no longer has unfettered access to the tip jar at the Flats Fix taqueria. If she could get her barmaid job back to supplement her income, perhaps she could then afford the high rent […]

Cis-Lesbian Fired for Misgendering a Trans-Male Rapist

The LGBTQ Commission for the mayor of Baltimore has just fired its only lesbian member, Julia Beck, for using male pronouns while referring to a convicted male rapist who wanted to be addressed as a female. Finding such behavior disgraceful, her former LGBTQ comrades have also denounced her and purged her from their ranks.  The […]

New York Gov. Cuomo ends death penalty except for babies

Albany, NY — New York State Governor Andrew Cuomo continues to make major changes in the name of progress and tolerance. These will appeal to liberal-progressives, and benefit ex cons and mass murderers across the nation. Signing off on these new policies will launch the governor’s bid for his presidential run among the 353,739 candidates […]

Glorious posters to support Venezuela’s Democratic Socialism

American workers and peasants! A danger is creeping over the beloved socialist government in Venezuela. A Yankee imperialist coup is about to overthrow their heroic leader, who has a unanimous support of all progressive celebrities and Democratic Socialists in the U.S. It compels us to produce these Party-approved slogans and visual agitation, to be printed […]

And the smirk, don’t forget the smirk

See more at Confederacy of Drones. In a bold move, Robert Mueller expanded his investigative and law enforcement powers to include the authority to read facial expressions and assess fashion statements.  Seeing the potential end to the current Russian collusion investigation, that so far has netted only post-election process violations having nothing to do with collusion, […]

How The People’s Cube Owns Wokeness Like a True Boss

Diverse members of the Cube kollektive! Everybody knows that it is now the ”in” thing to be woke. Being woke is being korrekt, and being korrekt is being woke. Wokeness has certain markers, and I have carefully taken a long time looking at all of the evidence, and have thus determined that all evidence points […]

Chuck and Nancy’s Democratic Response to Trump in Pictures

Last night Sen. Chuck Schumer and Rep. Nancy Pelosi delivered a rebuttal to Trump’s address to the nation by reading teleprompter messages that had been prepared in advance and consisted of blanket condemnations and generic denouncements of anything that Trump may or may not have said in his speech.  To compensate for the lack of […]

ProgPaper: The Ultimate Safe Space for GoodThink

Good news, Comrades! I am authorised by the Ministry of Truth to announce that victory over the mind is within our grasp.  As you know, our organisations are proceeding fast to cancel out all forms of Thoughtcrime™. They are using their influence to block notorious antisocial elements (like the Russian saboteur Oleg Atbashian) from Facebook. We […]

Highway to Hell

Is GLORIOUS day, Comrades! The People’s Republic of Kalifornia has honored His O’liness (PBUH) by naming a highway after him. A shovel-ready project built entirely out of left lanes, like his eight-year term served, from the start point of a Nobel Prize to the unveiling of the Presidential Portrait and funded by rethugglikkan tax dollars donations from citizens, this right left-of-way […]